Monday, May 25, 2015

Denial

I will say I probably spend half my year in a good state of body-image progress.
I might even say I feel like I have some control over myself.

The other half is spent deep in denial.
So deep that denial is asking me, "Hey, where are you going?"

Once you give up on your weight-loss/maintenance plan, 

you just try to ignore it.

What you don't know is totally fine.

As long as I can't see myself in a mirror,
As long as I don't stand on the scale,
I'm still amazing.

Then the mirror starts calling me.
The scale dares me to step up.

My jeans started laughing at me months ago,
but that was probably my imagination,
and a really unfair turn in the dryer.

What brings me back is getting tired of fighting with my jeans.
So I fight with my mirror and my scale instead.

It never goes well,
but apparently 
I just need to always be fighting 
with something.

I won't deny that.

My hope for today
is that maybe someday
the fighting will stop.

But the mirror totally started it.

-C McG

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