Thursday, May 4, 2017

Sleep Well


I'm feeling so much better than usual these days.

I'm sure part of the reason for that
is how I'm choosing to spend my energy while I'm awake.

The most important thing, though, 

is that I've been sleeping a lot better,
more deeply
this past week.

And I fully attribute that to the fact that 

I've been falling asleep to
the soothing sounds of
The Great British Baking Show.

It's a soft, reassuring hug,

a calm woman's voice,
explaining the layers of tiramisu,
soaking the lady fingers,
sprinkling powdery chocolate everywhere.

Tell me more about marzipan, gentle angels.

zzzzzzzzzzz

-C McG




Sunday, April 23, 2017

Read that Book

You know how busy you are, right?
Busy enough to neglect the things you actually like doing?
I know, right?

I recently hit a wall

where I got So. Angry.
that I'm not reading any books right now.

So, part of the reason I haven't been posting regularly lately

is because I found a book to read.

It's currently consuming my free moments.


When I'm in the throes of a good book,
or books,
I can magically come up with more free time.

Staying up just 15 more minutes at night,

waking up a few minutes early in the morning,
skipping important housecleaning projects,
shopping trips,
entire mornings.

I spend time with my books
like I spend time with an old friend who is back in town to visit.

I hope you'll take time to visit your old friends, too.

-C McG

PS. If you ever just REALLY miss me, I do post pretty regularly on Instagram. It's a quick, easy way to say "Hello, yes, I'm still alive and doing things."

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Unconditional Love


I decided to draw a comic inspired by a conversation husband and I had last week.


I carry lots of guilt and regret for gaining weight back I had previously lost.

I have to remember that for some reason,
I'm still loved anyway.

I'm trying to take care of myself
and trying to not despair
on those days when 
my body wants completely different things for me.

Like ice cream.

-C McG

Thursday, February 23, 2017

Our Other Job

[Possible drawing to come with this one later, but I just wanted to start writing today]

Today I was wandering around my office building,
lost in thoughts about how I'm on another weight-loss kick.
Another-another.
Again.


Committing to a weight loss plan is a bit like having a full time job.

You have to show up
clock in
make progress
stick to your to-do lists
meet performance goals
every freaking day.

And maybe you'll get some kind of promotion,
a reward,
acknowledgment for all of your hard work.

Eventually, if it's not something you truly love,
you'll quit,
you'll find other places to work,
or maybe you won't.

The exhausting part about weight-loss plans
is that you never really get to quit.

You are stuck in this job forever
if you want the benefits.

And there might be other jobs out there,
but you are ALWAYS working.

Or you aren't.
And then you are failing.

Or! You had a really amazing reason for quitting
in the first place.
You found another job that was a great fit
and you are in love
and the benefits are amazing
and you totally get along with everything.

So far, I'm just plugging away.
Haven't found anything better.
No magical inheritance.
No winning lottery numbers.

Would love to quit
but that's not an option.

Some days, that just makes me really tired to think about.
Today is one of those days.

Because we also have our real-life jobs to do.
And our relationships to maintain. 

And appointments to keep.

-C McG


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Prepare for a Full Stop




I'm sure I've snarked about my futon before.

It eats us alive.

We joke it's a time machine,
because we sit on it
and all of a sudden
it's three hours later.

--

My futon has reached a point where I actively avoid it.

It's villain-like,
devilish
in the way it woos us.

Its promises of a comfy space
to collect our thoughts for a moment,
enjoy a sip of tea.

But I know.
I've seen its true form.

It's a harbinger of dashed hopes,
mutilator of motivations.

It's a freaking STOP sign.

It tells us to give up today,
try again tomorrow.

--

I'm sure we all have THAT. THING.
that instantly will kill our best-laid plans.

Walking by the bakery window,
taking our shoes off for the day,
hopping on Facebook too early in the morning
and reading how terrible the world is.

Ahem.

--

I get asked a lot how I'm able to keep moving,
keep juggling all my tasks
and people
and commitments.

I'm not doing super-well at it.
But the constant moving keeps me motivated.

I try to plan my life where I either
completely fill my day with commitments,
or I don't schedule a thing.

It's easy for me to keep moving when I'm already moving.
I'll go the gym the night I have tickets to a play
and have just enough time for a grocery shopping trip in between.

The other days,
I greet my futon again.

It says, "Wow, you've worked pretty hard this week."
At that point, I can agree.
At that point, I can kick off my shoes.

At that point, I can lie there for a few hours
and enjoy every moment.

--

That's on a great week, of course.

I have found that even if I don't have externally-designated commitments,
the very act of NOT sitting on my futon means
I'll come up with something productive to do.

Maybe I'll even write a blog post about it.

- C McG

PS. As I was planning this post, this old Marc Manson article showed up again. The idea is that our action sometimes has to happen to create the motivation. If we're always sitting around waiting for motivation, we may never act. At the end, he writes, "...you can never become successful at anything without taking action."

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Where it Happens


Oh, to be so important,

so connected,
so influential,

to get behind the door
of the room where it happens.

- C McG

PS. I'm still listening to Hamilton on a constant loop. Here.

Sunday, February 5, 2017

So Much Strength


The cool thing about our privilege
is that sharing it
doesn't deplete it.

We have plenty to spare. 

-C McG

PS. If you are ever looking for a doodling project, one of my new go-to's is finding a quote that really resonates with me and drawing it in bubble letters. Then I have something to color in while I reflect on its message.